Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Outside the Lines

Been making changes. Small things; not such small things.

Had my second tat three weeks ago and in September will get my third. This one is on my inner left forearm.

I had virtually all my hair cut off last week, photo below. I'll likely always keep it close to this length from here on out. No more curl...that's the thing.

It's a testament to how good I'm feeling about myself -- how comfortable I am in my own skin now -- that I could willy nilly decide to make such a big change in my appearance without freaking out.

I decided definitely not to get another kitty. Which was my original decision when BeeGee first got sick several months ago.

His physical body is gone, but our connection and our love continues on. He's with me every day, and always will be. I don't need someone else to love. I have him, and I have myself.

Also, on the practical side, I honestly can't afford to have another cat for its lifetime. My savings are small, it's already difficult to make ends meet on my social security, and god knows what unforeseeable thing(s) might come up between now and the end.

And not being under constant stress and anxiety is worth its weight in gold. It's in my DNA to get stressed about everything, and I won't do that to myself anymore, given the choice.
I've really been enjoying this summer, and looking forward to autumn. At first I thought that BeeGee's dying was going to ruin the season for me. But it's actually been a wondrous experience, the grieving, the sadness, the healing, the growing. And I'm in way better shape than I was going into it.

Here's to living and growing. xx




9 comments:

Carol Cohn said...

I'm so happy to read about your positive mental attitude and strength as you go forward. Your hair is thick and the short 'do looks cute on you! The collages also reflect a contentment, as well! Keep it up! :)

jacki long said...

Yea Connie! So happy for you. Bee Gee is too!
Carol said it perfectly, you and your work are proof, Terriific!

tgarrett said...

Hi Connie- I loved reading this- you are an inspiration to me and will always have a special place in my heart. Love seeing the collage work.

Anna H said...

Love the new "do", how freeing!

Leslie said...

Amen to all that. Hope you have a lovely autumn.

Carol- Beads and Birds said...

Your new do looks great. I was going to say your attitude is great too, but it's really not an "attitude" is it? It's a greater sense of Self. A freedom of Spirit. I'm so happy for you.
xx, Carol

john said...

Love the new look. Love your collages. So pleased that you are in a great space. Hugs. :-)

ileneharris said...

I am sad to hear about BeeGee. 4 1/2 year old Milo would describe it as "The Circle of Life"...

Charlton Stitcher said...

How fascinating it is to see a photo of you! I look regularly at your blog and you comment on mine. I always enjoy hearing from you and yet I had no idea of what you looked like till now. It’s a funny business this social media. You feel you have a friend - but it’s a very particular type of friend whose face you’ve never seen. Now I can have the pleasure of seeing your face as I read!