Outside the Lines

Been making changes. Small things; not such small things.

Had my second tat three weeks ago and in September will get my third. This one is on my inner left forearm.

I had virtually all my hair cut off last week, photo below. I'll likely always keep it close to this length from here on out. No more curl...that's the thing.

It's a testament to how good I'm feeling about myself -- how comfortable I am in my own skin now -- that I could willy nilly decide to make such a big change in my appearance without freaking out.

I decided definitely not to get another kitty. Which was my original decision when BeeGee first got sick several months ago.

His physical body is gone, but our connection and our love continues on. He's with me every day, and always will be. I don't need someone else to love. I have him, and I have myself.

Also, on the practical side, I honestly can't afford to have another cat for its lifetime. My savings are small, it's already difficult to make ends meet on my social security, and god knows what unforeseeable thing(s) might come up between now and the end.

And not being under constant stress and anxiety is worth its weight in gold. It's in my DNA to get stressed about everything, and I won't do that to myself anymore, given the choice.

I've really been enjoying this summer, and looking forward to autumn. At first I thought that BeeGee's dying was going to ruin the season for me. But it's actually been a wondrous experience, the grieving, the sadness, the healing, the growing. And I'm in way better shape than I was going into it.

Here's to living and growing. xx