|Acrylics and collage, 5x5" on canvas panel|
Last week, when I did all that pinning and wound up with right shoulder problems, I momentarily thought maybe I needed a new computer. Although for no other reason than text and image size on my screen, which is easily fixable on my current system.
Tuesday, I stopped into my local computer shop and looked at the hot-off-the-press Lenovo laptop currently available. I was merely looking, but by Tuesday evening I'd decided to buy it, although not for a couple weeks.
I didn't sleep well Tuesday night. I did not have that feeling we're "supposed" to get when something new is on the horizon, that feeling of, "Ooh, I can't wait, I'm so excited." Nope. I felt unhappy, actually.
I woke up Wednesday thinking I could override that discord inside ~ you know, build the desire for a new computer, aka "manufacturing consent" in Noam Chomsky's words. I spent yesterday cleaning up my hard drive, deleting files I no longer need, backing up all my data onto my external drive. And reading reviews on Amazon of the latest version of Photoshop Elements. I'm using Elements 7, which is several years old although it works perfectly for me/my needs. (The issue for me is that although Elements comes with two licenses per disc, I'd already installed my copy on two different computers. So I would have to buy another copy to install on a new computer.) After spending at least an hour trying to decide whether to buy the latest version, 13, or get a new copy of an earlier version, I remembered that I had previously decided to not bother with Elements any longer, because I can get the photo manipulation tools I need online, for free. So then I spent another couple hours previewing various online photo programs and found three that I like.
It was late afternoon by this time. And gradually it dawned on me ~ "Why am I buying a new computer? For what reason? Just because I sometimes like bigger images/font size on the screen, when everything else works perfectly just the way it is and nothing needs to be upgraded?"
I'd spent the day basically out of my body. I hadn't even meditated in the morning. The good thing was that while I was doing what I was doing, I was mindful of being out-of-body. I literally watched myself go through this entire process.
My initial reaction to the idea of buying a new computer, on Tuesday evening, was, "It'll be cool to do something nice for myself." By last night, I was like, "Why the hell would I want to put myself through the stress of all that totally unnecessary change?"
The upshot of 24 hours of temporary insanity is that I won't get a new computer until I truly need one. Although I've had my current Lenovo laptop for nearly six years, I'm using the most recent stable version of Windows (7), I've got all the software I need and want and it all works perfectly together, and there's nothing I need or want in a computer that I don't already have.
There are always hidden costs to bringing something new into your life. If you upgrade one piece of a system, likely other things need to be upgraded as well. It all costs money (which is not the issue for me here, for once), and it takes its toll in stress, temporary inconvenience, a new learning curve, unnecessary complications, etc. I already discovered, years ago actually, that "new and better" very rarely is, all things considered.
The reality is that I'm virtually unAmerican, with my anti-materialistic, non-traditional, under-the-radar, simple-living minimalist ways. And I love it here, in my corner of paradise.