Thursday, April 12, 2012

Hidden Agenda

Hidden Agenda ~ 24x26 inches
I've managed to finish this piece, begun before I got sick, in dribs and drabs over the last week.  It's all discharged cotton and linen, with the exception of the ecodyed and rusted silk chiffon overlay.  This is another piece that had been on my design wall for many months. 
 
I'm hoping to design some new work in the next few days.  I've narrowed down my colorway for Fiberactions' split-complementary challenge so I have a particular stack of fabric to work with.  I'll most likely do more than one piece again, largely because the colors are so exciting together that I don't think one quilt will satisfy me.

But I'm still taking things one day at a time, since I've already had a couple of relapses.  The worst part has been the depression.  The reality with that is that life issues that have been on the back burner for months and years have moved closer to the surface, forcing me to begin to deal with them on a more conscious level.  This might sound dire.  It's more like the existential questions that I've been pondering deep down have sifted to the top -- things like WHY I bother to make art at all, and WHAT I want to do with my life for the next 30 years.  So in this segue time I'm rounding up some outside assistance to help me craft my path.

14 comments:

Deb Levy said...

I like this new piece Connie.

Hang in there, depression is hard, and I'm glad you are reaching out for help...it'll make the journey easier.

Valerie Kamikubo said...

This is a nice piece, and I like the title for it. It suits it well. Hidden agendas seem to be everywhere in my life (coming from inside and out). The trick is to discover/uncover them. Blessings to you , Connie as you continue to create and explore.

Jeannie said...

I love Hidden Agenda. The discharge pieces add so much visual interest. As to the life journey, sometimes we have to look to others to help us see what is right in front of us. I look at it as a side trip for supplies to help me on my main path. Creating is such a part of me, always has been, and I know that not creating would be a life I would not enjoy. xoxo

jenclair said...

Great title for this piece--parts of it look like a hidden code. Sorry to hear about your depression, it greys and depletes every aspect of life. I like Valerie's comment, "continue to create and explore." Sometimes detailed involvement in a piece can help you slip away from depression for a while.

artymess said...

Connie I am so sorry and I can sympathise with you ....it's a difficult path that you seem to be on but on a positive note when you recognise there is a problem then you can start the journey of repair and rebuild and you will be stronger at the end of it ......I love your art maybe you do it so that it gives pleasure to others ......xx

Jan said...

Wise words--I have nothing profound to add. Just know that you are in my thoughts...being creative is like breathing for me, even when I'm not sewing/quilting/collaging. That's when it comes out in other areas of my life, then I come up for more rarified air and start sewing again.

I love the title of your piece--brava for getting it finished and off the design wall.

xxoo
Jan

Irene said...

Don't forget that you are under the influence of that darn depression now and not in your normal state of mind. This colors how you look at everything in your life, even your past and your motivations. Don't give it too much credence. It doesn't deserve it. You will soon look at things differently againI hope it is dooner than later. xox

susan christensen said...

Hi, Connie - I like this piece which seems quite related to your daily collages. Interested in your comment about rounding up outside help. I, too, have some stuff surfacing that has been submerged (both intentionally and subconsciously) for years... Hang in, Pal. -sus

Judy said...

Connie, this is a beautiful piece!! There is so much depth, so much to look at and ponder.
I'm sorry you've hit a rough patch in your journey, but I think most artists, most good artists, do. There's so much that we put into our work, it would be almost impossible for it not to involve a lot of introspection - which can easily lead to depression. It's difficult and painful when you're at the bottom of the ravine, but as soon as you start climbing back up the steep wall toward the light, you will feel so good and your work will soar. One day at a time, my friend - and know that we all love you !

xo

Maggi said...

A rich piece with an intriguing title. Hang on in there Connie, depression always drags you down and you've started fighting back by enlisting help.

Sandra Rude said...

This is a beautiful piece, Connie! I hope to see many more glorious works over those next 30 years.

The Idaho Beauty said...

This is so much brighter (or maybe saturated is a better term) than a lot of the recent work you've shared. Such a difference between eco-dyed and the discharged cloth. Looking forward to seeing your direction on the new work.

MulticoloredPieces said...

Hi, Connie. I especially like this piece. Beautiful colors and patterns. I think we're on parallel paths. I keep trying to bury problems and they refuse to stay buried! May the sun shine upon your path.
best, nadia

frazzledsugarplummum said...

Beautiful colours. Sorry to hear you have been under the weather. Snuggle with Beeg.